I have never regretted being female, or desired to be anything but. I've always done everything I've set out to do, and I've done it well. I have had very little personal experience (vs. secondary experience, which doesn't mean that I have no understanding of these things) of harassment, sexism, chauvenism, abuse. etc... Beyond catcalls in bars, the occasional derogatory comment, wandering hands, and things of that ilk. I feel extremely fortunate to be a well-educated American girl (again, my personal distinction b/w girl and woman) in the present day.
But being "of the fairer sex" will always constrain me; I'm now beginning to accept this. It's all about safety. I've read all sorts of memoirs and blogs and journals detailing the adventures that men embark upon alone, all over the world, and it suddenly hit me, today, that those adventures are completely beyond anything I could safely (or possibly) experience, simply because I'm 105 lbs. and blond and not-male and not valued or respected the same way as men are in all sorts of cultures that I find fascinating and worth exploring - through no fault of my own. I'm sure you're all looking at me with contempt, since I'm of a population characterized by great freedom (compared to other female populations of various eras). You're glaring at these words. I assure you, I've read the stories of oppression of countless women and I've cried with them and raged with them --- BUT! But I guess I sort of thought of myself as above, or beyond, or outside their experience. I well and truly believed that I could do anything I wanted, thank you very much and have a pleasant day.
But, oooh no! It's just not possible. Imagine me, setting out, alone, with a backpack for some South American country to experience whatever came my way, relying upon my wits and the good will of others to get where I was destined to go. Ohhh, I want to! I know where I'd be destined to go... Probably assaulted and killed in some back alley, or abducted, or who-knows-what and I don't even want to think about it. Men do this all the time; buy a plane ticket, strap on some gear, and they're off and away. And they come back with amazing stories and pictures and experiences.
This started off as an unthinking, unstructured rant about two simple interrelated things; woman and her inability to travel alone. But in the course of actually putting my thoughts down into words, I'm realizing that it all goes exponentially deeper than that, and that flocks of less verbose people than I have written all sorts of vastly angsty books about it (and they were probably a lot less caffeinated than I am now), and have all sorts of historical references and personal experiences to draw from that I don't, so I'll leave it here. So, to sum up, I WANT TO TRAVEL ALONE BUT I CAN'T. The end. And I'm bitter. The end. I guess my library card will have to suffice for a visa. The end.
It really is this time! GRRRRAAAHH!
What a nice day, hee.
1 year ago
3 comments:
Alone? Maybe not, but I'm not entirely sure american men are so safe traveling alone around the world either. Perhaps safER, but not necessarily safE.
Anyway, the point of this comment is that a lovely young lady from my church/college has done just that- traveled EVERYWHERE. Granted not always alone, but with a greater and greater degree of freedom as she's gotten older. She's currently in the Amazon, I think, helping villages improve their economic status through basketweaving, which is more lucrative than the lumbering the men have been doing. As a result, it's also saving rainforest as men turn to baskets as a superior source of income.
Soooooo don't give up hope!
She's also about 105. But she may be more brunetteish than you.
Is brunettish a state of being, or a physical characteristic?
b/c I definitely have blonde moments. :P
I found this blog you may like to look at. This cute blond girl traveled cross-country all alone on a Vespa!
http://vespa-vagabond.blogspot.com/
I'm starting at the beginning and reading about her trip. It's amazing!
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