Dancin' Foo

At samba last night, we finally covered all of the main basics, which is just what I needed to refresh my memory. I feel like I'm ready for technique classes now, and confident to dance samba basics socially. It was tons of fun and my classmates and I agreed to come to the dance party tonight. Caspian has rehearsal (like he does most weeknights) and won't miss me. ;)

It's kind of strange to feel strongest in samba. I should feel strongest in rumba/chacha, but I need somebody to take me out on the dance floor for a couple hours to show me all of the bronze/silver figures I learned ages ago to jog my memory. Once I've gone through all of the old figures a few times, I'll feel confident again to work on technique.

I also bought new Latin shoes a couple of nights ago - not ultra high-end shoes, but servicable and reasonable ones. They're also pretty, and deviate satisfyingly from the trend of bronze satin and ultra-strappy. My current Latin shoes are bloody from dance floor battle wounds and hours of practicing, and blood isn't exactly a good fashion statement. I also don't like the t-strap that connects from the toe part to the ankle strap on my old ones, and went for a more wraparound style in the new ones. I'll give a more thorough review when I get 'em in a week or so. Inspired by a classmate, I also ordered a box ($4!) of those little disposable hosiery footies that you get in a shoe store to protect the merchandise from the stinky feet of the unwashed masses. Hopefully the footies will prevent my blood, sweat and tears from ruining the inner suede of my new shoes.

Not only will I go to the social dance tonight, but I was invited to the advanced chacha III class on Tues. evening at 7p. I think "advanced" re group lessons means bronze/silver, which is around what I believe myself to be in chacha. I watched some of the participants of the class practicing together, and I am quite capable of it. I'm hoping to get a reintroduction to all bronze chacha figures tonight at the social.

I rocketed through bronze and straight into silver while A and I were practicing constantly for a potential future partnership... Plans which got passive-aggressively blasted to smithereens in fall of 2008. After that, I hit a wall in Standard, got fed up and frustrated with myself, my close friend moved to far regions of the country, I watched jealously as my fellow dancers (and the other half of my smithereened partnership) attended competitions, I broke up with my dancer boyfriend, divorced myself from the team to put space between us, and focused on piano. I feel very wary of getting associated in any way with the State team again. I will go to their Elite lessons, but think I'll avoid going on campus for any events or lessons.

Now I watch jealously and regretfully as people I could have surpassed win events that I am confident (overly confident?) I could have won. I impotently chomp at the bit to see their successes. I have no happiness for them in my heart, only competitiveness. Why do I have to be like this? I'm a fool.