Resolving, Revolving, Redefining

I've noticed that an interesting and rather constructive fad has taken hold this New Year - bloggers describing to the world where they were in their lives one decade ago, followed by their resolutions for the New Year. I think I'll join the throng!

Ten years ago, it was the year 2000 and I was a senior in high school. I had a pixie hair cut and was a couple months away from having my first serious boyfriend. Like all kids that age, I was wrapped in a sort of hand-painted veil, which caused me to see the universe in exactly the skewed way I preferred. I'm sure the universe saw me exactly as I was: naive and dramatic. I have plenty of proof in my journals, since I was writing constantly at this age. I wrote short stories, meditations, poems, fiction, notes to my friends, love letters to fictional and imaginary love interests, etc. Most of it, apart from some of the stories, serves one purpose: To remind my future self that I will always find myself somewhere along a continuum of understanding. Sometimes I progress, sometimes I regress, but my state will always be transient. So is yours. The fact that I thought I understood it at 18 just drives home how silly and conceited we all are as we selfishly ponder how successful and fucked up we are. The universe doesn't care how well you can describe your sorrow. Describe it only if it does something for you.

Your life is just a breeze in eternity. Take this one chance and come fly with me.
- London Elektricity

And thus, my resolutions. In the past, these have been concrete and not very performance-based, since they were basically unattainable. I've read through a whole slew of resolutions featuring the typical "get in shape," and "adhere to my budget." I've written these in my past and I'm tired of it.

I resolve to be expansive and inward-turning as the moment dictates, without analyzing myself or the people who observe me. I resolve to be less concerned with minutae and less inclined towards the pointless analysis of the future. I resolve to be less in shape. I'm tired of attempting to cram my entire being into a little space called "in shape"! I resolve to spend less time agonizing over what I feel I should do, and more time doing what I want and need to do.