Tales of a supernova's daughter.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

The Defeat of the Futility Meh

Me: [describing the hole residing in the depths of my soul today] There's kind of a really emo pit of futility meh. FUTILITY MEH.

Steven: You need RH. Or to go to a park and throw rocks at the ducks.

It should have ended there, with me being kind of darkly amused as to why anyone would engage in such an activity as throwing rocks at ducks and kind of mad at myself for maybe thinking it might be fun as long as my aim was bad, but he continued...

Steven: So when I was on the crew team, the ranger was an ex-marine. We called him Spinecrusher, because one time, a fat asshole named Scott was throwing rocks at the ducks and Spinecrusher shouted, 'If you don't stop throwing rocks at the ducks, I'm gonna come down there and crush your spine!' Scott was surly and we all laughed about it. Man, that guy, what a character. He probably goes home to a bottle of whiskey and cries over pictures of his mom, who is actually still alive, living in the extension of his house. She's also Jewish, and guilts him endlessly about not becoming a fighter pilot, which he should have been - but one of the dumb kids in his class switched their tests so that he got an F. The dumb kid is now an ace pilot, while Spinecrusher is just a park ranger.

My emo was rendered powerless in the face of this epic tale.

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